Early interpersonal trauma can change our emotional world in lasting ways that make adult relationships difficult to navigate. Becoming aware of our patterns is a vital first step in beginning to heal both ourselves and our relationships.

So here are some ways trauma might still be affecting your relationships:

1. It…

Let me start by saying two important things, that were said by other people. First: “Katarina, if you never ask, you’ll never get”. Second: “fierce independence is a trauma response”.

Some of us as children learn to minimize our neediness so as to not be a burden to our parents…

The only article I wrote on childhood trauma had an increase in readings during the holidays. I was curious. I went into stats and found that the most reads were on the 26th of December — the day after everyone connects with their family.

Most people have at least some…

My heart is already broken
even before you can break it
that is why I have no fear
when reaching towards love

Since I was about fourteen years old it started dawning on me that human affection and regard are unreliable. I set out with so much faith and I…

I want you to feel as if the stars have come closer
that you might just be able to steal one
to take home with you in your pocket

I want you to feel that the moon is a little brighter
that it might be pulling you
a little closer

…